Broken Souls: Haymitch Abernathy
by hidden-behind-the-stars
Summary: So the second "installment"... Who really knows Haymitch? How did Haymitch go from the boy who won the heart of the Capitol to the drunkard he is in the Hunger Games? This shows his life from the winning of the Hunger Games to when he became like he was when Katniss and Peeta met him. Please read, and it's my story so what I say goes.
1. Prologue

**So here's the short introductory bit... Told from Mockinjay Haymitch's POV. So, it's obviously in my Broken Souls series. I can't decide if I want to continue it, you know? I may just make it some of his thoughts...**

Nobody knows me.

I don't want anyone to know me, or get close to me so that when I mess up, it doesn't hurt anybody else but me. I've hurt enough people that I don't want to hurt one more soul. I don't want to be who I was, I can't be likeable. No one will make the mistake of caring for me again.

I won the 50th Hunger Games. I killed seven people. I watched the girl I love die. My family was murdered because I made mistakes. I'm arrogant, strong, and handsome. Or I was.

I had been seventeen. Seventeen when the Games took away any resemblance of innocence I had left. Seventeen when I murdered. And tht was twenty-five years ago.

Who am I?

What have I left behind?

Who did I kill?

What is my story?

**...unless you guys like it. Review. I'll make the next chapter soon, update it... That type of stuff...**


	2. Chapter 1

I woke up in my room at the Capitol, groaning. "Ow..." I looked around and sat up. "Agatha!" She poked her head in, her gray curls bouncing.

"Yes, Haymitch, dear?" I smiled, Agatha was very nice. She won the first Games, before anyone had began training. She had been the only victor for Twelve, until I won, at least.

"What day is it? Why do I hurt so much?" I said softly, closing my eyes, trying to figure out why I hurt.

"Haymitch, the Games. It's three days after it ended. You hurt because you got hit with an axe in your stomach." She came in and sat on my bed, touching my leg softly.

I groaned softly, touching my stomach. I looked at it, pulling up my shirt curiously. Stitches went across my abs. I grimaced in pain, "So I won. I really won." I looked down sadly.

"But Maysilee..." I looked down sadly, throwing the covers off and looking around quietly. "What happened to her?"

"Haymitch... Maysilee died..." She whispered softly and hugged me tightly. "I'm sorry. I know you cared for her..."

I stared at the comforter of the bed as anger filled me. I pushed her away. "Agatha! I didn't just care for Maysilee... I loved her!" I yelled, putting my head in my hands and crying. "I. Loved. Maysilee!" I cried softly. Agatha sat there, watching me quietly, hoping that I'd soon stop crying.

After a while, I stood up, leaving the bed, looking around the room. There were only three pieces of furniture- the bed, a dresser, and a vanity. I went to the vanity, looking over the dark wood.

In the middle of the vanity, a golden mockinjay pin glinted in the dim light of the room. "Maysilee..." I whispered softly, touching the pin. "Why's this here?" I whispered softly, brushing my hair from my face.

"I thought you'd want it." She whispered softly, standing and walking over to me. "I told them to save it." She smiled sadly. "Haymitch, I'll give you a while alone." She left, closing the door tightly behind her.

I took the pin, "Maysilee..." I pressed my lips to the pin softly, my eyes closing softly as I thought about my times with her. "Oh, my Maysilee..." I smiled slightly. "I guess your in a better place.

I laughed bitterly and stuck the pin in my pocket before going to the mirror. "God, Haymitch. Those kids kicked your butt." I whispered softly, flicking my black hair from my vision. I sighed softly and sat on the bed, putting my head in my hands.

I sat there for hours, thinking about what I would do now that my Maysilee is dead. I'd go home and act strong for my family. My family... I wonder what they would think of me now.

Would they like the new me?

I took a deep breath then walked onto the stage, smirking at the Capitol people and flicking my hair out of my face. The crowd went wild. Caeser smiled widely, dressed in green. "Haymitch Abernathy!" He stood, smiling widely. "Long time no see, eh?"

I smiled, "I guess. I don't think it took that long. I was right- they were all stupid." The crowd laughed and I winked at them, hugging Caeser. "How have you been? Miss me?"

Caeser laughed, "So, your Games. They were very interesting." He smiled and played the clips.

I watched them quietly. My kills. District 4 male, district 6 female, district 7 male, district two female, district 3 female. I smiled slightly, trying to be confident, trying to keep up the facade.

Then the clip played.

Maysilee's death. I'd been with her until the last ten tributes. She was rather strong, but we didn't want to kill each other. So she'd left. It showed her one last look then it was just my face for a couple seconds before Maysilee's scream rang out, reverbarating around the valley.

I watched myself turn quickly on the screen and run to where I heard the scream.

-_I looked down at Maysilee, gasping, out of breath. She had been gone for only a couple minutes and she was already dying. "May? May? Maysilee? Maysilee? May!" I yelled. She looked at me, eyes fluttering._

_"Haymitch... Haymitch, don't leave me. Don't, please. Don't let me die." But we both knew she would die. She wouldn't live, not with ten people left. She wouldn't win. She was bleeding: there was so much blood. "Haymitch... Win. Make Twelve proud. And..." She hesitated. "Watch my sister."_

_I nodded, "Of course, May." I kissed her hair softly and held her hand tightly as she died. "I'm sorry May." I stayed with her until her breathing stopped. I sobbed heavily, burying my head in her chest. "Oh... My Maysilee..." I whispered softly. "Sweet Maysilee..."-_

They skipped the sappy parts. Then, me killing the District 1, skipping over my use of the boundary to kill her. I smirked slightly. I turned back to Caeser as the clip came to a close.

"So how do you feel?" Caeser asked, lounging to the side.

I smiled widely, "Fine now, glad to be back. And alive."

Caeser nodded, "Anything you want right now?"

"To tell you honestly..." I looked at Caeser closely and smiled sadly. "I just want to go home and see my family."


	3. Chapter 2

I'd told Caeser the truth. I wanted to go home. I wanted to see my family, I wanted to see my friends... I wanted everything to go back to normal.

When the train doors opened at the station, I was met by cheering. The people of twelve were well-fed again. I'd won. They were proud to again have a victor. I smiled and waved cockily at them, my eyes meeting theirs then quickly scanning the crowd from my parents and sister. I couldn't find them.

I was taken to the Justice Building for a lunch before I could go home. I talked and laughed with the people, hoping to please them with my act. Mayor Undersee always kept up the conversation, oblivious to my obvious want to leave.

I lounged in my seat, ignoring what he said. He was talking about something, but what do I care. Soon, Undersee let me go home.

It was dark when I finally left the Mayor's home. What little people were left wandering the square sent me sympathetic looks. I didn't look at them, keeping my head down as I walked through the square to the Victor's Village. The Mayor had told me the Capitol had already moved my stuff to my home, so my family will be there.

I hid my eyes under my hair as I walked up the hill to the Victor's Village. I looked at the homes and finally saw the number of my house. I expected all the lights to be on but there was only one bedroom light on.

I unlocked the door and walked in. "Mom?" I whispered softly, flicking on the lights. "Dad?" I went to the clean pristine kitchen, looking for signs of use. There wasn't any, except some tea on the counter and a journal on the kitchen table. I looked around. "Reba?" I started to walk upstairs, towards were light spilled out of a door.

I rubbed my chin, thinking about how soon I need to shave again. I poked my head on the door, seeing Reba laying on the bed, her black hair spilling over the stark white sheets and comforter. "Reba?" I walked to her bed. She looked like she'd fallen asleep on accident, hoping to stay up till I got home. I looked at the papers that were scattered around her on the bed.

First, was her leather diary, opened to the page she'd last written in. I smiled slightly and took the diary, pulling the pen out of the pages and putting both neatly on her vanity table. Second, was a newspaper. I'd never thought the news was important so I threw it into the trash under her desk.

I grabbed the covers and pulled them over her, smiling slightly. "Good night, sis." I left the room, turning the lights off as I continued down the hall. I'm guessing that my parents are already asleep, like Reba. I went in one of the rooms and sat on the bed. Two walls were entirely glass, showing a view of the woods beyond the boundary.

I took a shower then got in my bed, pulling the covers tightly around me. Tomorrow I'd see my parents.

I woke up, the sun shining through the walls of glass. I shook my head, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I changed and grabbed a long brown coat, groaning. I walked down the stairs, looking into Reba's room as I passed. She was still asleep so I decided to go on a quick walk around Twelve.

It was early morning, fog hanging over the streets as I walked, thinking about my Games. Doing something I'd never done before- analyzing myself. Barely anyone was up and around at this time in the morning. I walked to the meadow by the border, my head down so no one could see my face. I stood in the middle of the Meadow quietly.

After a while, I heard soft quiet footsteps approach me, "Hello...?" It was a girl. I turned, looking at her, my hair falling around my eyes again.

"Haymitch?" She smiled and held out her hand. She was holding a basket filled with strawberries. "Would you like to buy strawberries?" She whispered softly, eyes wide.

I looked at them for a long while then smirked, "How much, my sweet?" I asked, lifting my eyes to meet hers. She was beautiful. Her eyes were like Maysilee's. Grey, yes, like everyone else from the Seam's. But that's not what I saw. I saw strength, kindness, generosity.

She gulped and looked at the strawberries. "As much as you care to give me, victor." She replied.

I nodded and put my hands in my pocket, searching for the money. In the bottom of the pocket there was a bag of coins. I pulled it out and gave it to her. "Here."

She opened the bag and looked at it, eyes widening considerably. "Haymitch, this is too much." She handed the bag back. "Take it back." I looked over her, seeing her dirty hands and face, here stringy hair, and her thin body.

"No. You need it, don't you, sweetheart?" I smiled arrogantly.

She smiled at me. "Thank you, victor." She started to give me the basket of strawberries but I stopped her.

"Sell it to someone else." I smiled, leaving, walking back to my house. I opened the door and went to the kitchen. Reba sat there, her hair falling around her. She looked at me. "Hey, Haymitch." She said sadly.

I frowned and looked around, "Where's mom and dad?" I murmured, walking towards Reba.

"Haymitch, you don't know?" She whispered softly, her large grey eyes watching me.

I sat down across from her at the table, shaking my head. "What? What's wrong?"

"Mom and Dad... Their dead."

**Is this a short chapter? It looks like it is... 970 words? I hope you guys like it and it still sounds  
kind of like arrogant, cocky Haymitch and the sweet Haymitch.**

**And in case you don't like how I made Haymitch act, he's nice because he's not the Haymitch in the books- this is Haymitch before everything completely horrible happened. This story won't really be long. Haymitch is bitter and a drunk in the books because he lost everyone he cared about- his family, friends, etc etc... So this is what I think Haymitch used to be like!  
**

**Review? Please tell me what you think!  
**


	4. Chapter 3

**So here's this, it's an okay chapter. So, I have an idea for this and I hope this gets more reviews because I really like this story and I don't want to be alone. So, here's the chapter.**

I watched her, eyes wide in surprise. "They can't be dead. We can't be alone. They wouldn't leave us." I laughed, starting to cry. "This is a joke, isn't it Reba? A cruel, cruel joke."

"No, Haymith, it's not." She didn't laugh. She was dead serious. Her eyes were full of sadness. "Haymitch, their dead."

I put my hands on the sides of my head, trying not to cry. "What happened, Reba?" I whispered, shaking. "What killed them?" I looked at her through my hair.

"A fire. Our house burned down. I was studying with Leah so that's why I'm here." She watched me sad. "I'm so sorry, Haymitch. It was an accident."

I shook my head, rage filling me. "No, it wasn't Reba. It wasn't an accident. It's all my fault." I stood and walked away, tears filling my eyes as I stumbled upstairs, vision blurry. It was my fault- I'd used the Capitol against them and they'd punished my family. To hurt me. My parents are dead because I used the Capitol.

-_I stumbled up the slope, crawling at some points. I wasn't dead yet and the girl from one was doing as bad as I was. She moved at a steady pace a few feet behind me, her eye bloody, s_

_She stared after the axe angrily. It had been her last chance. Her last hope. I'd left my knife at the bottom of the slope. She thought it'd be a wait to one of our deaths, until one of us died from the wounds inflicted on us._

_I smiled again as I heard the slight zap of the boundary and the whirring of the axe getting closer. I leaned to the side, letting the axe zip past my head as it went towards her. Her eyes widened and she shook her head before the axe embedded itself in her chest. The cannon echoed and I heard Cladius's voice ring around the arena. "Panem, I introduce to you the victor of the 50th Hunger Games, Haymitch Abernathy of District Twelve."_

_I smiled slightly and fell to the ground, my eyes closing as sweet darkness surrounded me.-_

I curled up on my bed, crying. I felt something being pressed into my hand and when I looked at it, I saw Reba had placed a bottle of whiskey in my hand. I looked at where she should be but she wasn't there. I looked at the bottle and opened it, taking a swig. As I drank, the pain seemed to disappear.

I lay in the bed for hours, curled around the bottle. Even after the drink was gone, I held the bottle, hoping that my parents hadn't died. Not when I was so...young.

I fell asleep after a while, my thoughts blurring and slurring together.

I woke up later, my head full of pain. What had happened last night? I'd slept, after laying on the bed and crying. It took me a while to remember where I was. When I again realized that my parents had been murdered, I choked, keeping my feelings hidden away.

I stood and dressed in newer clean clothes and shaved what stubble had grown over the past two days. I rubbed my now clean-shaven chin and smiled then pulled my long dark hair into a ponytail. I stayed there, staring at myself in the mirror.

I was handsome, I'd always known that. Everyone had fawned over me. I had long black hair to my shoulders that I usually pulled into a ponytail. The Seam eyes, the beautiful grey. The tanned skin, from being outside in all my free time. Lithe, strong.

I watched myself, wondering if my appearance had changed as my mind had. I believed I looked now the same as I did before my Games. My personality... Everything I did was more sweet, more worthwhile. I cared more than I had before. Now that I had almost been killed, every little thing is a gift, a gift that I cherish.

I smiled widely again at myself and left. I flicked the little bits of short black hair from my eyes as I walked down the stairs and went to the kitchen. "Reba." I smiled at her sadly. She looked at me curiously.

"Haymitch, you feel better?" I nodded and went to her, hugging her. She was the last of my family.

"Reba, I'm going to the Meadow, I'll be back by lunch." I kissed her forehead.

Why did I feel so good? I wondered as I left the house, walking merrily down the walkway. I need to cherish my sister. Care for her. I shouldn't bring her down-I need to protect her from pain.

As I came to the meadow, I watched the sky, my eyes scanning the trees through the boundary fence. Nobody came and around lunch, I returned home. "Reba?" She smiled at me slightly as she poked her head out the archway into the home.

"Haymitch, lunch is ready!" She smiled widely.

I smiled and walked to the kitchen, smiling as I sat down, watching the meal laid in front of me. Everything was homecooked and looked delicious. "You made this?" I asked her, looking at her curiously.

"Yes, Haymitch." She smiled and kissed my cheek. "Oh, and after lunch, Agatha asked that you go over to her house. She wants to talk about your talent."

I ate with Reba, devouring every little morsel that was laid on my plate. As I rushed out the door towards Agatha's, I yelled a goodbye to Reba. When I went to Agatha's, I knocked softly on her door.

She opened the door after a while and smiled a wrinkled smile at me. "Ah, Haymitch. We need to talk." She brought me into the living room, guiding me to the comfy couch. "Tea, Haymitch?" She offered it to me, the steaming tea in her hand.

"No thank you. Reba said this was about my talent? What's a talent?" I watched her, eyes wide and curious.

"Every victor has a talent, something he or she took up after they won. Mine is knitting. What are you good at, Haymitch?" She smiled politely.

I smirked, "Acting." I laughed softly. "I'm actually kind of good at writing." I blushed slightly. "It's girly."

"No, it's not. If it helps." She smiled and got up. "That was easy. Go write and we'll looke at it later."

"Thanks, Agatha." I smirked and left.

**Good? Bad? Please review! Read my other stories! Please! I need reviews on those too!**

**So is this so far believable for Haymitch? And the writing, let me explain.  
**

**So this Haymitch hasn't gotten big into drinking and he will. He's not bitter, old Haymitch yet. The writing will be about his Hunger Games and what happens to him. The reason he doesn't write to keep himself sane is because when the last person he loves dies, he wants to cut all connections with the Capitol all together, like the writing. He starts drinking and he hates himself, slowly becoming the bitter, old man that Katniss and Peeta know! So, please tell me what you think of his talent! :D  
**

**REVIEW!  
**


	5. Chapter 4

**Okay, I hope you like this beautiful new chapter! And I would like to get 10 reviews at least before I update.**

I whistled as I walked across the lane, flicking my hair from my face. I stopped when I saw there was a basket of strawberries on the front porch. "The girl... She..." I laughed softly and picked up the card nestled among the berries.

_Dear Haymitch,_

_I gave the berries back, I hope your okay with that. I'm sorry, I just couldn't stand having the bag of coins and giving you nothing in return. It didn't seem moral and I didn't want to short you. This, in no way, makes up for what you have done for me. Thank you so much, Haymitch._

_Sincerely, Wisteria_

I smiled and slipped the basket onto my arm, walking merrily towards her house. I yelled hellos to everyone that passed and knocked on Wisteria's door softly. There was crying, then Wisteria opened the door.

"Haymitch!" She said, shocked. She was holding her baby brother and hugging her leg was the four-year-old Timmy. She saw the strawberries on my arm. "No, Haymitch, I won't take the strawberries back! You keep them. Please."

I sat the basket down on her doorstep, "Fine, fine." I looked her up and down, smirking flirtatiously. "You just have to take a walk with me."

She laughed and I smiled. Wisteria had a beautiful laugh. Like tinkling bells. "Sorry, Haymitch but I'm swamped- what with Timmy and Mickey..." She gestured with her one free hand at the two children. "I can't."

"I'll take Timmy." I smiled and held my hand out for Timmy. "Come on bud. Let go of your sister and come hang out with a man."

Timmy laughed at me, "Your not a man... Your not old enough."

It was then my turn to laugh. "Sweet, sweet, Tommy. I'm a victor. I can promise you, I'm a man."

Timmy's eyes brightened, "I wanna be a victor!" He let go of Wisteria and grabbed my hand, walking with me.

"Come on, dear Wisteria!" I called as I walked away with Timmy. She followed quickly, holding Micky tightly.

We walked in silence for a while and sat on a bench in the courtyard. Timmy ran off to play with some of his friends. I smiled and looked at Wisteria, "What's your life like?" I asked curiously, smiling slightly at her.

"It's great, for being in Twelve. My parents get paid well, their bakers but I prefer gathering berries. My brother's the baker of the family." She shrugged. "I'll do greater things."

"What's your favorite food?" I asked quickly, flicking my hair out of my face.

She smiled and thought, stroking Mickey's hair. "Strawberry Tarts. Their delicious." She smiled and looked at me. "What's yours?"

I shrugged, "Everything I've tasted in the past four months have been absolutely delicious." I responded easily. The time had passed quickly. Four months.

"Of course. Reba's a great cook, isn't she?"

"Very much so."

"What's your favorite color? Favorite time of day? Favorite animal? Favorite name?"

We talked for hours more, until the sun was disappearing behind the mountains. I walked her home and put Timmy to bed, while Wisteria sang Mickey to sleep.

Afterwards, we stood on her doorstep. I looked at her, smirking. "I had fun with you, Wisteria."

"All I did was talk."

"It was fun." I replied quickly and grabbed both her hands. "I hope we can do it more often, Wisteria." I smiled at her slightly and bent foreward, pressing my lips to hers. For a second, she didn't answer me. Then her lips moved on mine and I wrapped my arms around her. She put her hands on my shoulder and we kissed for what felt like hours.

I could get lost in her kiss. In the way my skin tingled at her every touch. The way she was delicate if persistent. I could get lost in her beauty and the simplicity and complexity that is Wisteria Mellark.

After a while that felt like seconds, minutes, and hours all at the same time, she pulled away from me. "Goodbye Haymitch." She whispered politely.

"Goodbye Wisteria." I walked away, eyes down, waiting for her to realize what I did. I heard the door close before opening again.

"Haymitch! You left your strawberries!" She yelled and I pretended I didn't hear her, continuing on towards the Victor's Village. "Haymitch Abernathy! Come get these right now!" She yelled again.

I shook my head and chuckled, disappearing past one of the houses. She snorted and went back inside, grumbling.

Goodnight, sweet Wisteria.

**Everyone, please, please, please I beg you to review! I need feedback to get better! Spread the word if you like it! Tell me why you don't!**

**Review, please.  
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	6. Chapter 5

**I hope you guys like this chapter! YAY!**

I was on the train, returning to the Capitol. It was the end of the Victory Tour. In all the districts, I'd acted the same, snarky and arrogant. The victors of the districts that'd I'd had to kill their tributes were colder to me than others but I didn't mind. I just couldn't wait to get back to Wisteria and Reba.

As the train stopped, I took a deep breath and left. The crowds yelled and screamed my name. I winked at them and smiled. I left and went into my room to get ready for the party in my honour. It shouldn't be completely horrible, not if it's all about me.

I dressed in a nice pair of clothes then went to the party. Everyone was happy and they all flocked to me. President Snow appeared beside me, "Haymitch! I hope you have fun!" He smiled and someone took a picture.

I almost puked at the smell of blood on his breath but somehow kept my composure. "Oh? Thank you, President."

He disappeared off into the party and I spoke to many people, seeing my happy, dancing stylists in the corner. A woman named Tigris smiled at me, her cat like eyes watching me. We danced often and as the night wore on, I got to know some of the inhabitants of the Capitol.

I danced, I drank, and I ate.

Until I felt someone lightly tap on my shoulder. I turned and saw a man in a black suit gesture for me to follow him. I did, passing through the crowds of the party. The man brought me to a private room in the President's mansion.

"The President has some work for you to do." He said as I entered. I watched him and another man in a black suit closed the door behind me.

"What if I don't want to?" I smirked arrogantly, lounging in one of the chairs.

The man smirked, "I wanted you to ask that. We have people set up around your home ready to get rid of your little sister on my command."

I frowned and got rid of the arrogant composure, leaning forward in the chair, "Who are you?"

"Renauld Black." He answered easily and sat down behind a desk. "Now, Mr. Abernathy, would you like to talk with me?"

I nodded, "What do you want?"

"Would you like some tea?" He asked as a redheaded Avox entered the room with a silver tray with a teapot and two cups.

"No, thank you." I waited as the Avox left the room, watching her movements. I turned my eyes back to Renauld's. "What do you want from me?"

Renauld smiled, "You seem eager... Either way... The President has some people that have helped him and he promised somthing beyond their beliefs in return. Now... You will help the President with rewarding these outstanding citizens."

The realization of what Renauld expected me hit me, "No, I won't."

"Fine." He grabbed the phone. "Kill her."

"No!" I yelled. "Fine, fine, I'll do it."

"That's what I thought you'd say."

As I sat on the train, I thought about my decision. I hadn't wanted to help President Snow but for Reba... I had to. I looked out the window sadly. This would scar me for life, I knew that.

That night was the first night I've cried since I found out my parents had died.

Four months passed, I'd avoided Wisteria. I couldn't tell her what I'd had to do. Reba didn't know. I walked around District 12 all day, moping about sadly.

One more month passed and I gave in. I had to see Wisteria. I had to talk to her. One month until I had to return to the Capitol for the 51st Hunger Games to mentor with Agatha.

I went to Wisteria's father's bakery and then went to Wisteria's room after saying hello to her parents. "Wisteria...?"

She looked at me from her bed, "What do you want Haymitch?" She said bitterly.

"What's wrong, WIsty?" I asked, sitting by her.

"Haymitch!" She pulled away. "Go away!" I watched her confused.

"Please tell me why your so mad!" I begged her, taking her hands in mine desperately. She pulled her hands from me.

"You haven't talked to me for four months!" She yelled. "Do you really expect me to just be okay with that?"

I pouted, "No... You don't understand."

"Then help me to understand, Haymitch!" She looked at me, crossing her arms.

I hesitated then sighed, looking away. "I can't. I want to, but I can't."

"Exactly." I looked down sadly. "Now, Haymitch. Leave."

I left, my head hanging sadly.

When I got home, there was a message on the phone. It was Renauld telling me to call back and catch the train tomorrow morning to go back to the Capitol. I put the phone back on the cradle and walked to the fridge, grabbing a whiskey.

I sighed and walked upstairs, drinking.

I'm not going to the Capitol. I'm going to make it up to Wisteria. I'm going to make her proud of me.

I fell asleep and for the second time in my life, I was holding onto the bottle of whiskey for dear life.

**Review please! Try to get to 15 reviews before I post again!**


	7. Chapter 6

**So this is the next chapter with the beginning of the 51st Hunger Games. I hope you guys like it... This is going to be over soon... I hope you guys enjoy the story!**

The month passed and Reba nursed my hurt ego. She understood me. I think. Either way, she was my sister and she would never turn on me. Not like Wisteria Mellark.

I held the whiskey quietly, swishing it in the bottle thoughtfully. "Wisteria Mellark." I laughed softly, drunk. "Wi-steer-ee-a!" I laughed again, hiccuping.

Reba came in, dress in white, smiling at me. She twirled, "What do think, Mitch?"

"Pretty..." I giggled then hiccuped, taking another swig of whiskey.

Reba groaned and took the bottle, "Get ready, Haymitch!" She scolded me. "The reaping is today!" She looked at the clock. "The reapings in ten minutes!" She pulled me up and hurried me out of the house and we walked to the square. "Come on, Haymitch!" She yelled.

Reba finally got me on the stage. I sat by Agatha and watched the hundreds of people in the square. I saw Reba and smiled at her, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. The mayor stood and gave his annual speech, his voice booming across the square. He turned and gestured to the escort, Madilee Ridyr. She giggled softly as she took the mic.

"Hello!" She said, a fake smile plastered against her face. She was dressed all in gold, here white hair sprinkled with golden flakes. She looked over the crowd of quiet, serious people before looking away awkwardly.

"Welcome to the reapings for the 51st Hunger Games!" She walked to the girls ball. "Before we begin the reaping, I would like to say; may the odds be ever in your favor!" She giggled self-counsciously and reached her hand in. "The female tribute for district 12 is... Reba Abernathy!"

My head shot up, my mind clearing as I was pulled back into sobriety. He didn't say what I thought he said. Reba can't go to the Games, she's mine. She's the one thing I have left of the times before the games, the one things the Games haven't changed yet.

As she began walking up, her long hair falling around her as she kept her head down, walking to the stage. I could see the pain behind her facade. She held together well. I watched as no one voulunteered. She looked back at me, a tear slipping down her cheek.

I watched her closely, analyzing the odds of Reba winning. She was fifteen, small, and innocent. She most likely wouldn't have any allies. It wouldn't matter that she was my little sister, not to them in the Capitol.

I missed the name of the male tribute and soon saw Reba being pused into the Justice Building. I walked sadly to the train, kicking the stones on the ground. Suddenly I felt a tiny delicate hand on my shoulder.

I turned around to see Wisteria's kind eyes watching mine. I smiled bitterly, "What do you want, Ms. Mellark?"

Her eyes widened in surprise then she whispered, "You know to call me Wisteria." Then her gaze softened into sadness. "I'm sorry Reba had to go, so sorry, Haymitch."

"It's fine." As I watched her, my heart felt tugged and I couldn't decide what to do. She'd left me, I shouldn't do anything but I still loved her. My voice softened considerably. "I'm sorry, Wisteria." I kissed her softly, pressing my lips to hers. She kissed me back, holding me tightly.

"Haymitch! It's time to go!" Agatha was yelling from the train.

I pulled back from Wisteria and waved before leaving quickly back to the train.

When I got on the train, I hid in my room, holding myself. I would most likely lose Reba too. Then my body went cold- this wasn't an accident. This happened because I hadn't gone to the Capitol when they called me.

I stood and left my room, walking to the room of the escort, Madilee Ryder. I slammed the door open, "Madilee, what have you done!" I pinned her against the wall and she gasped, shaking.

"What do you mean, Haymitch!" She yelled, scared.

"My sister! You reaped my sister- it wasn't an accident!" I yelled, glaring, filling with rage.

She gasped in surprise then whispered softly, "I'm so so sorry, Haymitch. They said they'd kill me. Kill me!" She shook in fear. "They told me to say that name no matter what happened." She whispered and I let her go then walked to the bed and sat down, putting my head in my hands.

"Are you okay?" Madilee whispered and reached her hand to my shoulder. I slapped her hand away.

"Leave me alone." I stalked out of the room, grabbing a whiskey quickly before hiding in my room.

**Review, review! Please, I hope you guys liked this chapter!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the wait, this is the next story I'll finish and when I finish this, I'll update the 15th Hunger Games then when we finally get to the Games, I'll finish Johanna Mason and maybe start a Cashmere story or Gloss or Finnick or Mags, just whatever works. On that note, I hope everyone has fun with reading this and likes Annie Cresta and Haymitch Abernathy!**

The news shocked me. I'd retreated to my room, passing the dining cart on the way and taking a bottle of whiskey quickly, popping off the top as I continued into the room. I took a long swig and sank into the plush chair in the corner of the cabin.

The time passed as I mulled over my problems with Reba and her being in the Games. I couldn't think of a way out of it and nobody expected someone from Twelve to win. We wouldn't win. I already knew that.

I took another drink then ran my hand through my curly black hair. I groaned, my vision swimming. I laid my head back then fell asleep, the black taking over my vision.

* * *

When I regained consciousness, it was to the sound of someone yelling my name. I blinked, my vision blurring into focus to reveal the auburn hair and green eyes of my little sister Reba. "Haymitch, are you okay?"

I blinked more, groaning, my head pounding until I wanted to cry in pain. I laughed unsteadily and shook my head slightly, "My head...hurts." I muttered, waving my hand to get her hand away from my face.

"You have a hangover, Haymitch..." Little Reba answered, her thin body shying away from me out of instinct. She got closer again and brushed my hair from my face, turning and getting a glass of water. She kept her eyes pasted on the table beside where I was at.

"Reba, I can't believe they took you." I whispered softly, the words falling from my lips involuntarily. "I can't believe..." I whispered and pulled her to me tightly, my body shaking as I started crying into her shoulder.

She nodded and held me, stroking my back softly as she murmured things in my ear as she tried to calm me down. "I know, Haymitch. I know it wasn't your fault."

She was wrong thouhg, it was my fault that she was being taken to her death. It was all my fault. All my fault. My fault. I pushed her away from me, unable to bear the knowledge that when she died, which I knew my Reba would be killed, that it was all my fault.

"What did you do? What's wrong?!" She yelled, her eyes wide and surprised.

I didn't want to tell her, I didn't want to admit that I'd really sent her to the arena, that it wasn't some freak accident that there was consecutive siblings from twelve. "I-I might've sent you to the Games, I might've done this to you..." I whispered softly, my voice shaking.

"What have you done, Haymitch?" Her voice shook horribly and I didn't want to tell her how I hurt her for such selfish reasons. Just because I wanted to be with Wisteria, I put my sister's life on the line.

I looked away from her, my head still pounding but completely sober, which I actually preferred to the drunken stupor of last night. "Reba, I'm sorry." I whispered. I could tell she wanted to know what I had done to send her to her death, "I had a deal with President Snow." I paused and looked at her face. "To keep you safe, he threatened your life."

She nodded, signalling for me to continue, "He told me that if I wanted to keep you alive, I would have to be his... I would have to give myself to him and the women he had to pay off. One man..." I whispered softly, smiling sadly at her.

"Why did he send me to the Games?"

I sighed softly and looked back at her from the door, "I wanted to make it up to Wisteria... I didn't go to the Capitol."

"So it's your fault if I die." She whispered softly, eyes wide and round. I nodded and she wrapped her arms around me. "Why did you think he wouldn't hurt me?"

"I thought he would leave you alone, that you were the only thing he could hold over me."

I looked down then took a deep breath, shaking, feeling horrible for what I did, for what I had taken from her.

"I was wrong."

**So the way I see it, there are approximately four or five chapters left before the end, Reba's training and Games will be in the next one (it'll be really long compared to this one). Then we'll have a little filler chapter with Wisteria and Haymitch and I hope it'll be adorable then the end of this part of the story, around the 52nd Hunger Games beginning, then the epilogue so... Four chapters? Yeah, then this will be over!**

**On the 15th Hunger Games, the next couple chapters (probably three districts per chapter so about four chapters) will be the train then we'll have training days one and two either a) in the same chapter or b) in two consecutive chapters... Please review if you read the Hunger Games and tell me. Each district will have it's own training page then we'll have a page for each interview... So many chapters! Anyway...  
**

**PLEASE REVIEW if you at all like this chapter or any of my stories!  
**


	9. Chapter 8

**Sorry for how long this took! I'm on fictionpress too! I have a bunch of other stuff to do! However, I'm going to put this at the front of my attention. This will be finished before anything else so I can get it out of my mind. Then I'll do Johanna Mason so I can just get them off my mind... Here you go though! ENJOY!**

* * *

The training started early the next day, with Reba going off with the other District Twelve tribute. Mentors weren't allowed to go but I had to get her trained better so she would have the ability to score well enough to be worth keeping around, to buy me some time. I took a long swig of the whiskey and lounged in my chair, my eyes drooping. I couldn't sleep the night before- I kept waking up to nightmares of the thousands of ways I could watch my little sister die.

_It was the blood bath. The most likely time she could die. She stood on the platform, looking off into space, waiting for the countdown to be over. "Twenty... Nineteen... Eighteen..." The seconds ticked down and she was bouncing back and forth. Around her, the scene continued to change, first from a large forest with a lake to the side, then to a desert, then to a mountain range. Never standing still for more than a single second._

_"Fourteen... Thirteen..." Each second closer to the second my sister would face death in the eye. I doubted she could live. Still, that inkling of hope stirred in my chest, begging for the flame to light it and send it blazing. I strained forward to look into her face, for the emotions that played across, but I couldn't see anything but determination._

_"Ten... Nine... Eight..." I saw her lips move with the words. She was wringing her wrists, getting ready to go._

_"Seven..."_

_I turned to see the other tributes, all their faces changing, morphing, just like the landscape. But the eyes always held the same fate, no matter what colour. Hate, anger, and cruelty. My sister had none of that in her still form._

_"Six..."_

_A wisp of hair fell from her ponytail as she bent forward._

_"Five..."_

_She took a deep breath..._

_"Four... Three..."_

_Everything seemed to stand still. I could see the scene begin to form in my mind as I saw her intentions- get something from the Cornucopia. I started to yell at her that it was a mistake._

_"Two..."_

_And no words came out._

_"One!"_

_The horn blasted and she sprinted forward. She wasn't fast enough and a bigger boy got there first, almost eighteen, his large body standing over hers as he turned. He raised the sword in his hand and brought it across, slashing her throat. She raised her hands to grip her throat as she fell to the ground._

_I rushed forward, there and not there, my hands touching hers. Blood pooled between my fingers, bubbling and slipping down my wrist. Down, down, down..._

_"Reba...!" I yelled as I was pulled away from her tiny, fragile body and into the oblivion of sleep._

I woke up screaming, my face sweaty and my hair damp, sticking to my face. I looked at the clock and saw that it was only four in the morning. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey on the nightstand and took a long swig. It had to drown out the fear, the anguish. This was all my fault.

If Reba died, it would be all my fault.

I took a long deep breath and ran my hand through my hair carefully, my breath evening out the more and more I drank.

* * *

Reba went to training and I held up my Capitol duties and sold myself to all the wealthy women of the city. I didn't see her all day- mentors weren't allowed at the Training Center anyway. I brushed my hand through my hair as I walked down the street, the name flitting through my head afterwards. _Trina Otherfellow. Trina Otherfellow. Trina Otherfellow. Trina... Trina... Trina... Trina Otherfellow... Trina..._

I scratched my chin and I felt the small bits of stubble. I tried to think of when I'd shaved but couldn't remember. It might've been yesterday, might've been two or three days ago. I groaned and walked down the street, a bottle of whiskey tight in my hand. I'd stolen it from the cabinet of Trina before I'd left.

I took another swig and looked blearily around at the passing crowds. Everywhere I went, people were crongratulating me for winning my Games. It was insane. How do these people not understand the pain everyone's going through? Forty-nine people-no, _children_, died so that I could live.

It was a horrible, horrible disgusting world.

I've heard of the time before. Before all this, when Panem was ran by different people and there was no Games, no real reason to revolt. The disgust of what the Capitol did rose in me and I found myself wandering the alleys and walks of the large "pristine" city.

How could they be so _brainwashed_ to think that this is right? That killing children is how the world should be. There is no real reason to kill children. There shouldn't be a reason. If there was, if there really was a reason, it shouldn't be for someone's entertainment.

I turned and threw the whiskey bottle at a wall, sinking to the ground sadly. Why did my little sister have to die for their entertainment? Why did I have to kill all those people for _them_? Truly, I am no better than they.

The victors are just as bad as the Capitol. They find fun in watching children kill each other but we are the ones that actually have the blood on our hands!

And some of us _like_ it.

**THANK YOU FOR READING! I know this chapter kind of sucks but... REVIEW PLEASE!**


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